Tuesday, November 8, 2005

I ponder myself...my own inadequecies...my downfalls. Why? Why are insecurities present in a heart that seems so confident? LORD, I do not understand my own thoughts and the why's and how's of my life...I believe the confusion...leaves me confused?! I long for answers, yet I fear them. I long for movement, yet I fear loss of comfort. I long for difference, yet the same is so familiar. How do I contradict myself! How do I battle myself and You are the same time. I long to obey You, yet my being struggles. Wants, desires, beliefs, passions...these are what stir the being into action. Why do I feel so immobile and sedentary?? My heart aches as I feel that pain is my allie. Oh sweet love, rescue me from this misery, hold me in Your gentle comfort, soothe me with Your whispers of grace...Oh how I long...all, everything more...

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